So, as the title suggests, this is the first of hopefully many travel blogs to document my time on the road. I started two weeks ago today on Tuesday 10th June and since then all manner of things have been happening. The most recent of which happened in Germany and involved a German flag...I'll come to this later on in the post.
First I need to go back to my first couple of days, I think it was my first full day in Bruges and I was walking around in the sunshine when I entered a small arcade of shops. It was quite a narrow arcade so when a man stood in my way, I wasn't able to get past him. This was the first part of his sales technique because he was, of course, a shop owner who was trying to get me to enter his shop to buy things inside...at least that was what I thought would be the case. This man was not a normal man, not that I'm saying he was abnormal but for starters he was dressed in a full cavalier outfit making him look like the lost musketeer. Instantly he knew I was English before I spoke, I guess the shorts, t shirt and sunglasses inside was a bit of a give away...or it might have been the pasty white legs but either way he knew. He asked where I was from and when I said Cambridgeshire he stood staring at me blank for 5 seconds, it was as if he hadn't understood what I said. Then all of a sudden he burst into life again but started reeling off various facts about Cambridgeshire saying it was part of East Anglia and was bordered by Suffolk and Norfolk and that one of the big cities was called Ely. While I was confirming what he said to be true he was gesturing into his shop and said that he had postcards from all around the world in his shop and pointed out ones from different places from the UK, I guess because he thought I would be impressed to hear places I knew...I wasn't but anyway he then asked what football team I support and so I replied Newcastle United. As before he stood staring blank for 5 seconds, I thought he hadn't understood me so I repeated myself but then he sprang into life once again. He was throwing various facts about the team and the city, it was at this point I realised he had some form of photographic memory and could probably reel off facts about almost every city in the world. A very clever sales trick to have, I thought. Once he finished talking about Newcastle he started telling me he was an artist and this was when I realised there was a patch of wall without any postcards on it, an area he told me to stand in front of but only after I took my bag and sunglasses off. He kept repeating the phrase 'I am an artist' as he shut the door to his box room of a shop and while he put a piece of white cloth across my chest. He then told me to smile and relax as he pointed what can only be described as a make shift camera in my direction. I felt like I was being prepared for the firing squad, that it was only a matter of time before the white cloth across my chest was put over my eyes. Well in a way he did 'shoot' me but with the camera instead of a gun. In the picture he took, I had the most uncomfortable smile, I really don't have a good poker face! He brought the image up on a computer that was so old, the pixels had started to run because there was brown strips coming out of my face on the screen. Then he pressed print, alarms bells were really starting to ring now. He printed off two A3 sheets of paper, the first contained a historic picture of Bruges and had a calender on it, the second was my uncomfortable looking face, this time without the brown lines. When he started to roll it up I was waiting for the price he was going to charge me, I had no intention of buying this thing off him but he wasn't listening to anything I was saying. He charged 7euro50 to which I gave a resounding no to, he tried to drop the price to 5euro but again I declined telling him that 5euro could buy my dinner for that evening. With that he let me go but it got me thinking about how good his act was, at every stage he acted with confidence and was able to talk his way through most things...well, dressed in a cavalier outfit in the middle of Bruges and I guess you have to have some confidence.
From Bruges I headed to the Netherlands and during my time there I had a 100m race against a walking tour guide and I won (for anyone who knows my sporting prowess will know how unlikely that is!!). I was also witness to an emergency situation in the house next to my hostel. It was 2:30 in the morning and we were about to play our last hand of cards when we saw flashing lights stop just outside from two fire engines and an ambulance. When we went outside it appeared somebody had collapsed on the first floor of a house and the only way to get them to the ambulance was to use the cherry picker of the fire engine, the speed of everything was the most impressive thing because I know how vital speed is in those situations. Also during my time in the Netherlands I was able to watch some beach volley ball as two courts were set up in the middle of Amsterdam.
After the Netherlands, Germany was next port of call and this is where the unfortunate incident involving the German flag comes into things. I have been in three German cities over the past week, all very different but the one thing they all had in common was how patriotic everyone seemed to be, although this might have had something to do with the World Cup being on. Almost everywhere you turned in Germany you could find a television playing the world cup or a re-run of one of the matches or you would find a German flag. Basically the whole country (well the cities I was in) seemed to have gone football crazy especially when it came to Germany playing.
So, I was in Berlin, in the middle of the Hyundai Fan Park, which is basically a long road that leads down from the Brandenburg gate and is full of massive TV screens and various eating outlets set up just for the World Cup. It is quite an impressive sight even if it is full of mass commercialisation. Anyway, I was quite hungry so I decided to get some bratwurst and chips, the vendor didn't seem too impressed with having to cook chips because all of the bratwurst was ready to go but he did it anyway. After a few minutes it was ready and the question was put to me 'Do you want mayo?' Now I should have answered no simply because I wouldn't have said I'm overly clumsy but I have my moments...this was no different. I get my food and stand next to the stall and put my food on the little stand off the side. Before I know it the wind picks up and starts blowing a flag that was tied to the bottom of this stand about; it goes near my chips but I manage to block it...on the first time. The second time it happens the flag completely covered my chips and subsequently the massive dollop of mayonnaise that was proudly protruding off the top. By the time I'd managed to wrestle the flag off the chips (the wind was very strong...honest), the red part of the flag was fairly covered in a massive white mayonnaise stain. At that point I quickly picked up my food and walked away as fast as I could without looking back, I thought that if the vendor was grumpy about cooking the chips he would be absolutely livid by the state of his once pristine flag.
That is pretty much it for now, I'm in Poland for the next few days, although the train ride from Berlin was quite interesting when the brakes under my carriage started to smoke and burn but after twenty minutes of men looking and poking the side of a train with a walkie talkie we got on our way again and here I am. I head to Krakow tomorrow and then to Prague on Saturday. I'm sure they'll be just as full of stories as the last two weeks have been, hopefully I won't be disgracing too many other national flags...
